Pipe dreams and real facts had diverged and none of them lived, singly.Idler, juggler or stargazer, one who makes his life by doing menial jobs, wandering around from one to another city, accused by building castles in dreamland, and like so, I am one of the dreamer who goes down like dominoes. I was completely uninterested in realtionships going along well with whispering, mischief-makers, ready life friends, janglers and tumblers and not even remotely close to all. I wasn’t the wonder man of this life which is going on these days. I was talking , laughing and eating less frequently than anytime I used to live years ago. I was growing different, maybe more than five senses or fewer than five senses, but I was sure that there was something wrong with me. It was incredible difficult for me to get on well with common happy and healthy mood people. There was no brilliance in life to be so happy that it was a mare’s nest to realise the jousissance. There were two ways to survive in real life; I was just going to behave as them or I was going to choose to live alone and stand being isolated. The world which had a cello music with storytellers who tell tales on warm patios with roses is not the real world . This was my pipe dream. The arms of my pipe dreams were not enough long to hug all the life I wish , there were no angels in white clouds in the blue sky, mostly reality was black and white, there were no fairy houses in the neighbourhoods of the real city, crystal balls, magic sticks, making three wishes from a genie , witching …They are all cock and bull story which belongs to me. I know really well that I will always walk around other streets, strange and odd for me , but I need to play along with others in usual streets, there is no other way of being cured, the quiteness ended, the time is now as usual as it is wound, now I breath the same rush hours like all real people. The streets look like me now, I look like the streets. It is impossible to clarify the world, moreover I don’t want and intend to clarify. I will go on living without fermented pipe dreams.
